Using Valentine's Day to handle your woman during March Madness

March Madness is imminent. It can stress a relationship. Here's how you can use Valentine's Day to keep your girl from leaving you because, in her words, "obviously college basketball is more important than me!"

First of all, it TOTALLY depends on what kinda woman you have..

Type A: A girl that's into March Madness and is as excited as YOU are to watch the tournament.

Congratulations! You don't need to do much on Valentine's Day for this type of girl because she's all like "what a dumb holiday, don't get me flowers, how lame." But what you DO have to do with this type of girl is at least fain some interest in the teams she's rooting for during March Madness. If you don't do at least that, you're in for a hard time. This type of girl will go as far as denying you sex for rooting against her teams. That's the last thing you want so just acquiesce and continue to enjoy a healthy sex life.

Type B: A girl that could care less about March Madness.

You need to spoil the FUCK outta this type of girl on Valentine's Day. Flowers, chocolates.. Ask a gay dude what he would do to make it the most romantic Valentine's Day for his man. His worst 20 ideas will be better than anything you could come up with. Choose one, do it, and then MAYBE she won't be a bitch when you're completely ignoring her during the tournament. If she starts squawking when you're trying to watch a game you can just be like "Did you NOT have a wonderful Valentine's Day?" She won't be able to deny it.

Type C: A girl that understands your sports obsession but just kinda likes to root for the underdogs.

This girl is closer to the type B girl than type A in that she doesn't really "get it." However, she totally LOVES you so it doesn't bother her that you're so into March Madness. She even enjoys watching some of the games with you because she just loves seeing you so passionate about something. You don't need to spoil her as hard as you would a type B girl on Valentine's but you need to do something. Flowers and/or chocolate is okay but her priority is quality time with you so take her out, make her feel special. Be creative and do something a little different than the normal "date night." This should be more than enough to not have to worry about her leaving your dumb ass.

At the end of the day, be thankful that you have ANY type of girl because you don't deserve her. But you already know that. :-D